Tag Archives: parties

the evidence

We take a lot of photos, and they mostly end up on our phone, on our computer, on Facebook. We rarely print them out to hang on the wall or enclose in a physical album. Most of the time, we forget about them. Today is Elliott’s birthday, so I thought I’d try to find a baby photo to post on Facebook. I scrolled through iPhoto, way back to Elliott’s 1st birthday party. Elliott was wearing a silky blue “1st Birthday” crown with a matching onesie. He didn’t look upset, really. It’s something closer to alarm, and it is in every photo. Even in the few in which he smiles, his, wide, worried eyes don’t match his curving mouth. He slept most of that day. He tasted his first cake, and then he went to sleep. In fact, he slept for nearly six hours, which was not normal for him. We hadn’t gotten the diagnosis of autism yet, but I knew something was wrong. All of the photos from that day reveal a beautiful and confused little boy, held by a depressed and overweight mother. This was a hard time. The photo album before Elliott’s First Birthday is Ben’s First Trip to Disneyland, during which the sensory processing problems we did not know he had, coupled with his severe language delay, reveal an overwhelmed and miserable little boy. Not the trip we had envisioned. This was also a time, unfortunately, during which I felt it was completely acceptable to wear a do-rag out in public, even to Disneyland. And then to be photographed in that state. These were desperate times.

IMG_1086

Elliott’s first birthday

IMG_0859

the decidedly unhappiest place on earth

IMG_1885
me. do-rag. Disneyland. not okay.

Last year, we sang happy birthday to Elliott, tentatively gauging his response. Would he be overwhelmed? Would he want any cake? We created a “safe” room for him to retreat into, with his favorite movies and music videos playing on loop. He used it once or twice, but not much. He had a friend over to celebrate, a huge first for him, and they played together the entire time, pausing for hugs and smiling together for the camera.

This year, he’s been talking about his birthday for weeks. He helped plan it. He invited two friends from school to a small party at the local bowling alley. He chose where he wanted to go to dinner. He jumped into our beds this morning, excited for the day to come. Ben made him a present and played Happy Birthday for him on the piano. There will be cookies at school, and cupcakes at dinner, and there will be new photos, too. He will smile in the photos, and this time his smile will match his eyes, because every year, he is happier. Every year is better. And I know how fortunate we are for that.

Advertisements
Tagged , , , , , , ,
Advertisements
We Will Begin Again

"To hold a pen is to be at war." -Voltaire

GentlemanSparks

Gentleman with a hint of Spark. If you have any Questions you would like answered email GentlemanSparks@Gmail.com with the subject #ASKGS x

midnightpears

Just another WordPress.com site

The Winter Bites My Bones

The Collected Poems of Dennis McHale: 1981-2016

A Birth Project

Transracial Adoption from one black girl's perspective

The Guilty Preacher Man

abandoned illustrations

projectophile

\ˈprä-JECT-oh-fahyl\ (noun) 1. A lover of projects, especially those derived from scavenged materials and made more beautiful through paint, thread and sandpaper.

Another angry woman

Thoughts and rants from another angry woman

Unkilled Darlings

Faulkner said, kill your darlings. I say, put them on the internet and let strangers read them.

MiscEtcetera v2

Random bits about libraries, digital culture, life, and writing

glass half full

This is my blog. I write a lot about autism, raising boys, and my own alcohol consumption. I also tend to cover topics like poop and toothpaste. You've been warned.

jessepeckwrites

about all things human

The Belle Jar

"Let me live, love and say it well in good sentences." - Sylvia Plath

Daniel Nester

essayist, poet, college prof, hubby, dad, Queen fan

spookyactionsbooks.wordpress.com/

a publisher of quality chapbooks

James Henry Dufresne

"To hold a pen is to be at war." -Voltaire

"To hold a pen is to be at war." -Voltaire

%d bloggers like this: